According to mine Realism and Interactivity.
The ability to interact with and influence the behaveour of characters is the prime reason I love these
novels/games. As a gay (lesbian) woman I am always on the look-out for opportunities to steer female characters towards lesbian actions.
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Usually when i choose a game I’m looking for just smth to fap to but then I become engaged in the the story or I start liking a character and end up emotionally attached to some aspect of the game until I complete it and forget about it in like a day or so.
This of course only happens in a few adult games but usually i’m just like “oh, boobs!” and that’s it. Sometimes I play some games that have a few rape-play scenes and try to avoid them entirely not bc i don’t like rape-play (which i don’t entirely) but bc I like a character too much or sometimes I choose to unlock scenes from a specific character bc I like their personality a lot.
I like (sometimes) romance in my porn.
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You mean to ask what do we enjoy in porn video-games compared to all-public video-games?
Personally, that’s the fact that porn games don’t treat everyone like innocent souls that must be sheltered from the sin of lust.
In my opinion, human society has a real deep problem with sexuality, either we want to erase it completely, forbid it, censor it, hide it, deny it, pretend humans grow on trees, or we are obsessed with it and make it lose the point because we make fucking as mundane as eating food and it doesn’t imply anything special anymore, there is no sexual balance in human society, only unhealthy extremes.
I think it is because of the church who claimed that lust is a sin, indulging our bodies’ needs is a crime, desire for intimacy is evil, sexuality should be for reproduction purpose and nothing else, definitely not for pleasure.
In order to control people’s needs and restrain their freedom, the church has brainwashed human society for centuries and here we are now struggling to figure out the right sexual balance within our needs and relationships.
Should we hate sex? Should we not care and fuck everything we can? Our society is struggling between these two unhealthy extremes, both of them are empty because one denies their own needs for pleasure while the other turns pleasure into a routine which is nothing special.
There is also the problem of monogamy that the church has enforced on people to restrain their freedom and control them too.
Humans have been brainwashed to think that they can love only one person at a time, as if the heart gave a shit about what the mind dictates, once more to control people’s needs and desires and make them believe that sexuality should have no other function than founding a family, denying our feelings and our need for intimacy with people that we love if there are more than one.
So of course, people engage in exclusive relationships because that’s what they have been told to do, cheat on each other because monogamy is an absurd concept to begin with, marry when they have children to consolidate their family even if they are not happy together because they believe that their children will be happier to live with parents who don’t care about each other all together rather than share their time between their parents each on their side and happy to be free, then divorce as soon as they think that their children are autonomous enough to not need an united family anymore.
I despise the church because they have brainwashed people with bunch of absurd concepts, all for the sake of controlling them, which have completely messed up human society and thrown everyone into struggles to figure out a right balance in their life between their own needs and desires and “God’s laws” (written by humans by the way).
Another example is incest.
The church has brainwashed people to think that too much intimacy with your own family is evil whereas they claim that all of humanity started with one man and one woman, Adam & Eve, which implies that all of humanity is one single family from the start since every human share the same first ancestors.
And yet, the church is hypocrite enough to claim that incest is evil and against the natural order of things.
Well, guess what? Humans are the only specie who rejects incest, all natural species who live in the nature and have not been brainwashed don’t care about blood-related when they want to mate. Natural species are more honest than us civilized specie about their needs and desires whereas we specialize in denying what we truly want because we fear judgement of a society brainwashed by a hypocrite church, turning the society itself hypocrite.
I enjoy games which challenge social norms such as incest, monogamy, and sexuality itself, however it is hard to find good games which don’t flood us with meaningless porn without an actual story nor actual relationships building.
I enjoy sex the most when it is a reward!
When I feel that I earned it because I developed a deep relationship with someone to the point to trusting each other enough to not hide anything from each other and desiring intimacy, I enjoy feeling connected not only in bodies but also in hearts and minds.
The problem is that porn are mostly made by people who treat sex as nothing special, who make fucking with someone to be as mundane as eating food.
Indeed, most porn games lack depth of characters and relationships building to satisfy me.
Actually, even the mere concept of “porn” is unbalanced because if something contains even the slightest visual sexuality then it is systematically categorized as “porn” even if the sexual content is only a small part of something bigger, the entire things is categorized by a small part of it because sexual content is such a big deal in human society that the slightest mention of it in anything is enough to influence the opinions of the entire thing and categorize it as “porn”.
For example, the first Mass Effect included a final visual sex scene for each romance and the game was accused to be porn even though it was a “normal” video-game which merely offered ONE sexual intimacy scene to reward a relationship developed during the entire game before the game’s end.
Then Mass Effect 2 was released WITHOUT visual sex scene because of social pressure.
And guess who are the people who always interfere in everything to censor sexuality?
That’s right, that’s people linked to the church!
You know, those people who are frustrated because they deny their own needs and so they can’t stand that other people are more free than them and always interfere to make everyone as frustrated as they are to feel right about themselves. 
So yeah, to answer your question, what I enjoy in porn games is that they challenge absurd social norms and offer me what our hypocrite frustrated and frustrating society denies me. 
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Key point one
Mature Visual Novels have a stronger potential in producing emergent narratives, e.g. branching storylines including alt story scenarios like What If A happened to X as opposed to B happened to X.
Second major point, Visual Novels are experimenting with non linear mechanics, by default that is the appeal.
Erich Zimmerman although does not endorse visual novels as a viable Games system, but he still recognised that Visual Novels are Games because fits in line with his definition, Gaes are a series of mechanics, dynamics conflict driven challenges make the player decide on actions that reach Quantifiable outcomes., the choices of Visual novels kinda impacts the progression system.
What did you expect from the company who removed visual sexuality from Mass Effect 2 because of annoying catholic organizations whose purpose is to make life as miserable for everyone as it is for them? 
If the church hadn’t claimed that lust is a deadly sin and hadn’t created such a deep social taboo about something as natural as intimacy then humankind would be much less complexed and unbalanced and intolerant religious organizations who despise everything and want to forbid everything wouldn’t have their way so much as they do.
I want to give an example, the japanese anime High School DxD is all about a pervert virgin young male protagonist who grows surrounded by a harem of willing girls who always get naked around him HOWEVER since it is a shonen, meaning an anime destined to young virgin boys, then no matter how much the protagonist is lustful and how much the girls are willing and how often they get in hot situations, NOTHING EVER HAPPENS because if it showed sexuality then it would be classified as a hentai, which is utterly ridiculous because this is an anime which is not a hentai but which totally revolves around sex, teasing people with hot situations after hot situations and blue balling them because nothing ever actually happens even though both the protagonist and the girls are obsessed with sex, they never do anything, which is so lame and frustrating that people better watch hentai to not be teased and blue balled and this is why I much prefer the fan-made adult version Devil’s Academy by Naitoh who doesn’t treat people like kids and sex ACTUALLY happens, which makes a lot more sense than the frustrating original anime considering how pervert the characters are, that’s what I appreciate with adult games: they are free-minded, they are not burdened with taboos (when Patreon doesn’t ruin everything with their own hypocrite taboos like allowing rape but forbidding incest ) and they don’t treat people like kids, that is refreshing in a complexed society who treats people like kids who need to be sheltered from reality.
I also like a lot Adventurer Trainer which is a fan-made adult version of the japanese anime Kono Subarashii Sekai which I find even better made than Devil’s Academy.
Oh and Paprika Trainer which is an adult fan-made sequel to Totally Spies in which the spy girls are more mature and the plot is genius, I really recommend it even if you are not fans of Totally Spies which I am not either! 
There is also Lord King which is not bad as an adult sandbox visual novel about being the lord of a district of a city in a post-apocalyptic world, managing your own district and interacting with other districts and the queen of the city, there is much to do. 
I also enjoy Once In A Lifetime even though the plot doesn’t make sense, I can’t help but enjoy its humor even if some of it bothers me because it is judgmental, I can’t deny that it is a very fun visual novel! 
I also recommend After The Inferno which is an adult visual novel of professional quality whose plot is intriguing…
There is To Be A King which is an interesting adult visual novel about becoming the king of a roman empire, managing your empire, maneuvering through political intrigues and power games, interacting with other nations, making alliances and/or wars, all while developing relationships and building your harem while being careful to not cause conflicts between your women, it is a very deep and rich adult visual novel that I requested to be added here and has been ignored and which hasn’t been updated for a long ass time, which frustrates me because it really grew on me.
And there is Girls Next Door which turned me on so much that it made me cum without me even touching myself, which was the first and still only time that happened to me, unfortunately it is still at its beginning and has not been updated for a year now, which despairs me since it is one of the most promising adult visual novels I ever found… 
I don’t find so many adult games which satisfy me because most of them are cheap porn made by perverts who don’t actually care about solid plot or relationships building or even romance at all because they consider sex as a purely physical activity and don’t give a shit about the emotional bonding part of it which makes it special to begin with.
Indeed, sex without emotional bonding is merely two pieces of meat which rub against each other and there is nothing special to be excited about it since it is meaningless.
What makes sex so thrilling is what it means for the people who share intimacy, complicity and trust, the deep connection not only of bodies but also of hearts and minds, which is the important part which is too often forgotten, making sexuality meaningless and just as mundane as eating food, nothing special about it.
See? From the countless adult games which exist and flood the web even right here, I can recommend only 7 worth attention to you, which shows how rare meaningful adult games really are.
I played many many adult games which started really promising and eventually turned into meaningless cheap porn always because of the same reason: Patreon.
Indeed, developers who are funded by Patreon grow complacent when they realize that people are willing to pay for meaningless porn and since that takes minimal work to make then that is what they do for easy money.
I played many adult games which started with a solid story whose porn was merely part of it and whose female characters actually had a personality until it all was lost to greed and laziness and the porn became the priority since that is what patrons want, the story became accessory and the female characters became mindless bimbo sluts and ever more meaningless female characters are added for one single reason: more pussies to fuck and not even in a creative way, often skipping foreplay and even basic affection such as kissing, that’s always just put your cock into her pussy and move until you cum, not even caring if SHE cums, that’s how most porn games are and that’s why I am so selective with the ones I choose.
So yeah, Patreon is the biggest destroyer of adult games not only because its funding system turns most games into cheap porn for easy money for greedy and lazy developers which, as you rightly said, wouldn’t be possible if the patrons were not willing to pay for cheap porn to begin with, but also because of Patreon’s hypocrite rules which prohibit themes based on Patreon’s administrators own personal preferences who have no issue with rape but despise incest for examples, which is nothing but hypocrite and provides us with countless adult games in which a protagonist lives with his “landlady” who really behaves like his mother and with his “roommates” who really behave like his sisters so everyone not dumb easily figures out that they really are his family however because Patreon despises incest then we get absurd relationships with landlady and roommates which don’t make sense all because of censorship, which makes me despise Patreon because they impose their own personal preferences on everyone even though they are NOT the ones who fund projects, they only provide the website where developers and patrons meet and yet they are arrogant enough to dictate how other people’s money has to be used, which utterly pisses me off and always makes me wonder why everyone accepts this hypocrite tyranny and no one creates an alternative funding network, which really wouldn’t be hard to accomplish since Patreon also started with nothing, you only need a few promising developers and a website with a regular payment system and that’s all you need to make an alternative to Patreon so why everyone submits to Patreon and no one creates an alternative is beyond me.
Also, Patreon doesn’t have any requirement of progress, meaning that developers keep being regularly funded as long as their project is in development without any requirement of progress which encourages developers to make their project last the longest possible and provide minimal progress to make it last the longest possible and keep being regularly funded forever and that’s what many greedy and lazy developers do, actually most of developers funded through Patreon, which adds to how rare adult games developed seriously and not for easy money are.
However I disagree that it is hard to notice promising adult games because the more you play adult games and the more you learn to identify bad patterns and avoid them.
At first, I downloaded and I tried everything because I knew nothing but now, I download only a few of all adult games because I no more need to try them to know they will be bad because I learned to identify patterns right from the game’s description and it is really easy because there are not that many original developers, most of adult games stick to the same common patterns and the more you play games, the easiest it becomes to identify these recurring patterns without even downloading the games just from a look at their description.
I have no doubt that religions are destined to be abolished because the more sciences and actual knowledge and understanding of the world progress and the less people rely on faith to have answers to their questions, that’s why religions have always treated sciences and knowledge as their worst enemies such as the snake who tempted Adam & Eve to taste the forbidden fruit of knowledge, Lucifer the “light bringer” fallen angel based on Prometheus the fire bringer titan punished by Zeus because he offered the knowledge of fire to humankind who started technology and stopped relying on faith to get things done and all religions have their own “evil bringer of knowledge who hinders faith” because all religions know that with actual knowledge and understanding of the world, faith becomes useless and that’s why the church treated all free thinkers and scientists as heretics and killed them until the intellectual revolution of the french philosophers of light who put an end to the Inquisition and religious obscurantism who tried to keep people ignorant and manipulable and granted freedom of thought and research and ever since, sciences and actual understanding of the world have progressed and have rendered religions irrelevant until eventually no one will rely on faith and religions will become a thing of the past from a time of ignorance.
However, we are not there yet and religions keep trying their hardest to survive by hindering freedom of thought the most possible, interfering with everything to slow down social progress because it renders them irrelevant.
Well, to be fair, not all religions are bothersome, actually only the cursed trio of abrahamic religions, meaning judaism, christianism and islam, still don’t accept to let people be open-minded and still try to preserve obscurantism of faith even though sciences have already proved them wrong many times and keep doing so which is to be expected from religions based on arrogance, injustice, inequality and intolerance, there is no doubt that the world will be better once abrahamic religions are no more but we are still not there yet, they stubbornly resist in their foolishness but they can’t deny actual knowledge and understanding of the world provided by sciences and philosophy, they are doomed and the sooner the better so we can FINALLY evolve!